E2 - Fight, Flight, Freeze, Fawn
Hey there, my fellow Thriver and welcome back to the Trauma Mama podcast where we talk about what trauma is, how it happens, how it affects our brains, behaviors, and relationships, and most importantly, what we can do about it. I’m your host and Trauma Mama Alexandra Pratt. In our last episode we talked about what trauma is, what it means and how it happens. In this episode, we're going to discuss how our minds and bodies respond during the traumatic event(s) and how those natural stress responses affect our perceptions and relationships. Then we'll cover several different techniques you can practice to reduce these reactions including mindfulness, radical acceptance, progressive muscle relaxation and more.
The term fight or flight was first used by M.D. Walter B. Cannon in 1915. He studied and taught at Harvard University department of psychology and specialized in the research of physical reactions of laboratory animals under pressure. He coined the term fight or flight response and redefined the biological term homeostasis to signify the internal balance of the body. The concept of homeostasis was developed by Claude Bernard, a French physiologist. In biology, homeostasis is the state of steady internal physical and chemical conditions maintained by living systems. According to Cannon, our bodies continuously seek to maintain a predefined state of equilibrium by regulating the complex interdependent system of organs. Changes in variables such as body temperature and fluid balance set off a series of processes aimed at returning the body to its original balance.
In his research Cannon observed noticeable physical changes in the digestive systems of animals experiencing fear. He subsequently spent some 20 years studying the relationship of psychological and physical effects of stress on animals. the years since, physiologists and psychologists have continued to build on and refine Cannon's work. They've come to a greater understanding of how people react to threats using what they now call the four F’s: fight, flight, freeze, and fawn.
To fight is to confront the threat aggressively.
Flight means you run from the danger.
When you freeze, you find yourself unable to move or act against the threat.
Fawn is the response of complying with the attacker to save yourself.
Before the fight-flight-freeze response kicks in, something happens to make you feel you're in danger. Someone or something may be threatening to cause you physical or psychological harm. In our first episode we defined trauma as a fear response. This threat may be real or imagined. As soon as you recognize a threat, your nervous system shifts into the acute stress response.
Have you ever felt scared, threatened, or in danger? Chances are, you reacted one of these four ways. These are natural responses and they are all hard-wired in our brain. These natural physiological responses serve as automatic ways of protecting ourselves and increase our chances of survival. They can serve vital a purpose in the right moments. The underlying goal of these responses are to minimize, end, or avoid the danger and return to a feeling of calm and control. However, because the fight, flight, or freeze response is a physiological in natural, it can be difficult to think about it rationally. Meaning we do not control which response we react with in the moment. We can also respond with one that prevents can us from doing what's best. Learning to recognize the responses are activated in us will help us know how to handle them.
So these for Fs are Physiological responses that happen in our bodies during a trauma event.
The physiological response to anything that seems to threaten our survival is very complex, but it all happens quickly. Our bodies do not let us down when faced with a life-endangering situation. They prepare us for the fight with the many means available to us as a result of evolution. While many of the threats we face today are symbolic and evolutionarily, our brains evolved to deal with physical threats to survival that we had to quickly respond to. What do I mean by symbolic and evolutionarily threats? Multitasking, taxes, interests, tormenting colleagues, lost phones and broken household appliances – these were non-existent in the early days of the human species. The problem is that we cannot turn off the surge of adrenaline when our attacker is a phone bill. However, our bodies still responds with biological changes that prepare us to fight, even though there is no actual physical threat.
Here’s how it works
Hormones such as adrenaline are released into your body from your endocrine system
Your heart rate speeds up
Your blood pressure shoots higher
Your pupils dilate
Your veins constrict to send more blood to your muscles
You begin to perspire
Your muscles tense
Your smooth muscles relax, allowing your lungs to take in more oxygen
Digestion and immune systems shut down so energy can be used for dealing with the crisis
You begin to tremble and
Your blood sugar may shoot up as your liver breaks down glycogen
What in our brain makes this all happen?
The amygdala is involved in the fear circuit in our brains and it’s responsible for the four F responses. The amygdala is also responsible for deciding what memories are stored and where they are stored. The level of emotion that is attached to a memory determines where it is stored in the brain. The amygdala is an area of the brain that controls our decision-making and emotional responses. Its tasks include the processing of fear and evaluation of the threat, all based on information conveyed to us by our senses, such as our eyes and ears.
From what we have learned, a tiger presents an extremely dangerous threat, causing the amygdala to instantly send an emergency signal to the hypothalamus. This area of the brain is like a command center that communicates with the rest of the body, activating the sympathetic nervous system in an alarming situation. The fight or flight response is activated by the sympathetic nervous system. If the tiger we see turns out to be a soft stuffed toy, we take a deep breath and laugh out in relief. If, however, the threat is real, the amygdala triggers a sudden and intense unconscious emotional response that shuts off the cortex, making it hard for you to think clearly about the situation. As your brain triggers the release of stress hormones such as cortisol, you find it increasingly hard to problem solve and concentrate.
The sympathetic nervous system triggers one or more of the four F responses before we consciously make any decision on how to act. Many things happen very fast. First the hormone epinephrine (also known as adrenaline) and norepinephrine (also called noradrenaline) are released into our system. We notice the effects: Rapid pulse and respiration increase oxygen intake for fast action. Blood pressure goes up and extra oxygen is sent to the brain, increasing alertness. Sight, hearing, and other senses become sharper. Blood sugar (glucose) and fats from energy stores are released into the bloodstream to give us the extra power we need.
Skin temperature goes up and the increased sweat on the palms of our hands improves our grip– should we need to climb a tree to flee. Digestion is slowed down – all our energy is now conserved for staying alive. All these reactions are caused by some very fast chemical processes in our body. I’ll say this again: All these reactions are caused by some very fast chemical processes in our body. Our preparedness for the fight/flight/freeze/fawn is automatic and set in motion without conscious cognitive processing. The body needs about 20 minutes to physically recover from an acute stress reaction. An adrenaline surge impacts our bodies up to an hour form reaction.
In this way, the This whole process takes a toll, and you may not recover to your original level of functioning for several hours. Now I want to dive deeper into what each of these 4 main responses look and feels like:
These distorted ways of relating to ourselves and the world can profoundly affect our relationships
Some disorders tend to be associated with certain stress responseSome disorders tend to be associated with certain stress response patterns. Here are a few of the ones that have been identified:
Fight
The fight response happens when you face a threat you think you can defeat (whether you actually can or not). When you launch in fight mode, the hormones released by your sympathetic nervous system—especially adrenaline—prime you to do battle and, hopefully, triumph.
Fight looks and feels like
Crying, yelling, screaming
The desire to punch, smash, stomp, rip, kick, break or throw things
Your body is Flexed/tight, you may grind your teeth, Have a glaring look in your eyes and have fight in voice
Feelings of anger/rage
Homicidal/suicidal feelings
Knotted stomach/nausea or even a burning stomach, like a bomb is erupting inside of you
Belief
Fight type: Narcissism (extremely self-centered with an exaggerated sense of self-importance) Fight types are unconsciously driven by the belief that power and control can create safety, assuage abandonment and secure love.
Next up is Flight
Happens when you don’t think you can defeat the threat.
Feeling cold/frozen, numb,
You may have pale or flush skin
Feelings of stiffness or heaviness
You may be holding your breath/or experience restricted breathing
You feel a deep sense of dread and fear
Your heart is pounding however decreased heart rate, can sometimes also happen
Belief
Flight type: Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder. Flight types unconsciously believe that perfection will make them safe and love able. They also try to outrun the trauma. Flight types appear as if their starter button is stuck in the "on" position. They are obsessively and compulsively driven by the unconscious belief that perfection will make them safe and loveable.
Freeze
Now let’s talk about the freeze response. Freeze types, unconsciously disconnect from experiencing pain. When you respond with Freeze:
You feel cold
You have numbness in your body
Your skin is pale
You feel stiff or heavy
You have a sense of dread
Your heart is pounding
Your heart rate may decrease
Dissociation
I’d like to describe what it means to dissociate a bit further. Dissociation is an adaptive response to threat and is a form of “freezing”. It is a strategy that is often used when the option of fighting or running (fleeing) is not an option. We shut down to draw less attention to ourselves, or in extreme cases, play dead by leaving our body and mentally and emotionally shutting down. It is important to know that dissociation is a normal response in the face of trauma. However, it can become problematic when Dissociation becomes the only and primary method of coping with situations.
Belief
Freeze type: Dissociative Disorders. They could also believe, unconsciously, that people are dangerous. Many freeze types unconsciously believe that people and danger are synonymous, and that safety lies in solitude. Outside of fantasy, many give up entirely on the possibility of love.
FAWN
When you've tried fight, flight, or freeze several times without success, you may find yourself using the fawn response. Fawn types seek safety by integrating with the wishes, needs and demands of others. People who tend to fawn typically come from abusive families or situations.
For example, if you're the abused child of a narcissistic parent, your only hope of survival might be compliance and helpfulness. You can recognize this if you notice that no matter how poorly someone treats you, you are more concerned about making them happy than about doing what's right for you.
Belief
Codependency. Fawn types seek safety by merging with the wishes, needs and demands of others. They act as if they unconsciously believe that the price of admission to any relationship is the forfeiture of all their needs, rights, preferences and boundaries.
Combinations and disorders per type
The four F responses can also occur in combination with each other to form hybrid patterns. The most common combinations include:
Fawn-fight: controlling threats in coercive and manipulative ways
Fawn-flight: avoiding the threat by becoming invaluable in the situation
Fawn-freeze: surrendering to the threat by taking on the victim role
Flight-freeze: avoiding threats by focusing on other situations
Inappropriate Fight, Flight, or Freeze Responses
When we experience stress or trauma, we all automatically gravitate to one of those four ways depending on the given situation. For example, if we saw a tiger in the middle of the city centre, most of us would run (in other words flight). Wouldn’t be appropriate to fight, for most of us anyway or even freeze and standstill, or even trying to Fawn by negotiating with a wild animal. We would hopefully respond accordingly.
What happens when we have experienced childhood trauma, we would respond, regardless of the situation with one, maybe two of the Fight, Flight, Freeze or Fawn types. This was a way of coping as a child, but when we carry those behaviors into adulthood, it can cause problems, as you can imagine for us.
Each type of response is appropriate in certain situations. The healthiest scenario is that you display flexibility in your responses. If you can overcome the danger, you stay and fight it. If you can't, and there's a way out, you run.
The problem for many people is that they respond one way when a different response would serve them better. These inappropriate responses can lead to mental and emotional disorders.
Making an Inappropriate Choice. Everyone makes the wrong choice of how to respond at one time or another. Sometimes, it isn't very important, but often it has adverse effects. For example, if you fight an unwinnable battle when running would have been more appropriate, you may increase your danger rather than minimize it.
Getting Stuck in One or Two Responses. If you get stuck in one or two types of response, you don't have the flexibility you need to adapt to different situations. This often happens in posttraumatic stress disorder. If you face danger daily, you may come to rely on habitual responses instead of the responses most appropriate for each threatening situation.
Perceiving Threat Where There Is None. There may be a time when you feel threatened where no threat exists. Perhaps you don't have a complete understanding of the situation. You might have a stress reaction to one meaningless detail. If you think there's a threat, your brain and body will respond to the threat with fight, flight, freeze, or fawn, whether the threat is real or not. When that happens, it's nearly always an inappropriate response.
I’d like to express quite strongly here that these behaviors are learned behaviors in response to your childhood environment. It is not a character flaw or a weakness. You did what you needed to do to survive. The great news is that, what was learned back then, can be unlearned and you can learn more helpful behaviors. It starts by understanding yourself a little bit more and trying to recognize what your response type is.
Moving forward after the trauma with any relationships we do form in the future, with their inevitable ups and down, are prone to remind us of problems we experience during the trauma which can trigger upsetting and painful flashbacks, causing inappropriate reactions that can strain the relationship. During the stress response it is very hard for you to “just snap out of it”. Your brain has had thousands of years to develop its own effective way to keep you safe, it is not just going to allow you to overcome this system. This means you need to practice switching off the response when calm, over and over so that it becomes second nature and possible to effectively use when stressed.
What can we do?
After experiencing trauma, we often have abnormal fight or flight response and the most effective treatment more often involves counseling and psychotherapy. This helps to better identify the psychological or psychiatric roots. In some cases, pharmaceutical treatment may be recommended, particularly if related to severe anxiety or post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
Stress is something that happens automatically when you feel threatened. What you can do, though, is find healthier ways to deal with those responses when they happen. How do you switch this stress response off? Aside from participating in therapy, I’d like to discuss several things you can practice now that will help.
Recognize the Difference between Real and Imagined Threats.
Step one, is awareness. Knowing the physiology means you can recognize when the feelings are starting to creep in and know that it is time to act. Once you have awareness of what your typical response patterns are one way you can start to change course is by recognizing the Difference between Real and Imagined Threats. You may discover that what you perceive as a threat in the here and now is only a vague reminder of an earlier threat.
It is really important to understand the physiology behind each physical symptom. This will remove some of the fear and the catastrophic misinterpretation of physical feelings that can occur, such as, “my chest is tight I am having a heart attack”, “my thoughts won’t stop, I must be going mad”, “I feel dizzy, I am going to faint”. When anxiety causes your stomach to feel weird or your chest to feel tight, imagine telling yourself “I am medically safe. This is my body preparing to run or fight. That is all”. At first, you might believe this for a second but then the “what if” feeling might creep back in. That’s ok. You just need to remind yourself you are safe over and over, each time the feelings start to pop up. Over time the head-heart shift will occur.
Calm or Act
When you are confronted with something you feel threatened by, you have two main choices: either you can do something or calm yourself. To help the stress response pass, you can breathe deeply, practice mindfulness of the present moment, meditate, pray, sing, write, or talk. However, if the threat is real and you can do something about it, you need to act. Your body is geared up for action, whether that's running or fighting. What's more, by acting, you release the physiological burden of the stress response.
Mindfulness
Learn to be in the present moment and not trapped in your thoughts and feelings (or more simply — learn to accept and let go)
What is mindfulness? It means paying attention to the present moment, on purpose, non-judgmentally. There are lots of apps and classes that dedicate themselves to teaching people how to be mindful through guided meditations.
Mindfulness is one of the most effective tools to learn for this. I am not going to sugar coat it, mindfulness is not easy, it takes practice. Some days it will be easy-ish, others it will feel almost impossible.
After practising mindfulness for some time you start to recognise when your automatic survival response is occurring. You learn to notice the sensations and thoughts come up in your mind and body. You also learn to separate yourself from this, becoming a passive observer, able to come back to the present moment at any time. You now get to decide how to respond rather than being a slave to your fight-or-flight response.
For example, imagine you are in a social situation, you have just said something and the person opposite you frowns. Your brain switches on the fight-or-flight, emotions flood your body, thoughts occur including “he/she doesn’t like me”, “I said something wrong”. Suddenly you want to run away, stop speaking, or even respond with cruelty. The reality is that there are many, many possible reasons for his/her frown, the majority of which have nothing to do with you or your comment. However, your brain doesn’t care about that. It has sensed danger and has prepared you to survive. With mindfulness, you would recognise that all this was happening and instead have the tool to step back from the automatic response and decide, what do I want to do? Most of the time you then just notice your automatic response and move on to the next present moment. Letting it go.
There are also a lot of misconceptions about mindfulness out there. For example, people often tell me that mindfulness is about clearing the mind. Whenever I hear this I feel sad. This is one of the main reasons I hear from people who tried mindfulness and said it wasn’t for them. They tried it, couldn’t clear their mind, felt like they had failed and then understandably stopped. You cannot just clear your mind, your mind does not want to be cleared! That is not possible. Mindfulness is actually about noticing the thoughts and bringing yourself back to the present moment, over and over. Over time it will get easier. It’s like a muscle, the more you practice the stronger that muscle will get and it will be easier to let thoughts go.
Trigger the relaxation response
You can learn how to switch off your fight-or-flight response using breathing exercises and progressive muscle relaxation. Progressive muscle relaxation (PMR) is an anxiety-reduction technique first introduced by American physician Edmund Jacobson in the 1930s. The technique involves alternating tension and relaxation in all of the body's major muscle groups.
How to Practice Progressive Muscle Relaxation: Find a quiet place free from distractions. Lie on the floor or recline in a chair, loosen any tight clothing, and remove glasses or contacts. Rest your hands in your lap or on the arms of the chair. Take a few slow even breaths. Choose one muscle group to focus on at a time, tense that muscle for 15 seconds and then slowly release with a long exhale through your mouth. I usually start with my shoulders, raising them to my ears and holding tightly, then exhaling a long slow breath as I release the tension after 15 seconds. You can repeat this one as many different muscles as yo’d like. I recommend practicing this routine as you lay in bed about to fall asleep.
There are also various Youtube videos and Spotify links for guided exercises. If you have your own breathing exercises and relaxation techniques try to use them for 10–15 minutes twice per day for the best outcome. Practice when calm. Then use when the stress response pops up. If these exercises do not work for you immediately, do not worry. Like a muscle, it needs to be built and maintained through practice.
Yoga
The roots of yoga can be traced back over 5000 years. It was never intended as an exercise program. It was about separating yourself from, or calming, the fluctuations of the mind. Finding a way to overcome the ego through self-knowledge and wisdom. Asanas, the poses, were added much later.
Yoga was designed to unite the body, mind and the breath. To bring you into the present. If you are anything like me and struggle with mindfulness or concentration in general, yoga is a godsend. Your brain is distracted just enough by the movement that you can finally focus on the breath and the moment. Join a local yoga class, or watch a video online and see if it makes mindfulness easier for you.
Exercise
This is a high priority for managing stress. The fight-or-flight response is meant to be followed by a burst of activity. That’s the whole point. Exercise is therefore a simple and effective way to calm the nervous system. It not only uses the energy created in the body, it metabolises (breaks down) excess stress hormones. Lower levels of stress hormones mean a calmer body and mind. Exercise also increases endorphins, the feel-good hormones. So it’s an easy double win.
Exercise is the quickest thing you can do to manage the stress response. You don’t need to learn a new technique. You can do anything at all that gets your heart rate up and you can do it anywhere. Just 5 minutes of intensive sweat inducing movement will start breaking down excess stress hormones. Longer exercise obviously increases the benefits for your health and long-term wellbeing, but 5-minute bursts at regular intervals can be surprisingly helpful.
Up next
So that’s a look at how our minds and bodies respond during trauma and how those responses can affect us long after the trauma has ended. On our next episode I’m going to look at more emotional, mental, and behavioral affects that occur after trauma.